And I Love Her [TAG: Lucas]

"Hey! Hold up, Hart!" She called out, rushing up to the seventh year in a white and purple spring dress and matching flats. She was nervous. It was a weird thing to be feeling because rarely was the Keeper ever nervous about anything. At a young age, heck she was still a young age now, she could go out on the Quidditch pitch in front of thousands of fans, faces of people she didn't know and had never met, and bring down the house. Not bat an eyelash. But to approach Lucas now, one on one, the day of his graduation... Her stomach was fluttering. Maybe that kiss a night prior by the lake had something to do with it? No. They were friends. She was taken (at least she thought so!). She couldn't entertain that idea or overthink it. It had been wrong to do... But then why had it felt like... Whoah...

"Geeze. Where are you off to in such a hurry?" She panted when she finally caught up to him. "I train seven days a week running miles and you're giving me a run for my money." She gestured down to her flats with disdain. "These things are hell." She noted with a furrowed brow before reaching into her messenger bag. "You nervous?" She asked bluntly, looking at him doing her best not to bring up the kiss from the previous night. After all, maybe he didn't want to talk about it. Maybe he wished it never happened. Maybe he wished they were never even friends. Even so she wanted to part paths with him (wasn't that what graduation was) on good terms. "I uh.... Got you a graduation gift." She murmured pulling out an old leather bound book and holding it out for him to take.

"It's from Tomes and Scrolls..." Amelia began awkwardly trying to make it less of a big thing than it was. "I was in there looking for a new journal cause my playbook is almost full and I saw it on the shelf. I thought you might like it is all. It's a murder mystery. Part of a series.. So if you like it there are others." She shrugged a light pink raising in her cheeks. "It's just... I know you like to read. I mean, I see you reading all of the time and I thought you might like this one. They said it was good?" Gosh she sounded like an idiot. "Stupid." She murmured looking down at her flats for a moment and rubbing the back of her neck with her hand. Her broomstick necklace Oliver had given her shimmered around her neck in the sunlight as they stood in the courtyard. "If you don't want it I can take it back. It's not a big deal." Man, Alicia would have a field day with this.

The last 24, no 12, hours had been such an interesting whirlwind. He had kissed his friend, and it had been what it hoped to be with her. He didn't even realize he had been hoping that until they had locked lips. But then the after part came, and he realized she was still with Wood, and he still didn't have a chance with her. So he had worried overnight if she even wanted to still be friends. Of course, he supposed, he could always just permanently move to Australia even if this quidditch thing down there didn't pan out.

When he heard his name called by Amelia, he was headed towards where some of the set up for the graduation was. He was running very early, but what else was he supposed to do? Everyone else had their parents with them in the castle. He supposed his father would eventually turn up at the ceremony. He couldn't get a read on the emotion of her calling out to him, and he wondered if maybe it would be best to not talk to her. But he wanted to. He was so torn, he just kept walking. Eventually she caught up with him. "Ah well I heard there was food at this pre-reception thing, and I figured I'd check it out." Not really. He didn't even know if he could stomach anything right now. "Well if it's any consolation hell looks good on you. So you should be set for eternity." He said joking around with her a little bit, but also meaning it. She did look very lovely in that dress. He just had on a suit, which no matter how many times he had worn one still felt uncomfortable on him.

"No. Not nervous." Well not about the ceremony. Maybe about standing here talking to her when he didn't know where they stood. Then she reached into her bag and pulled something out saying she had got him a graduation gift. "You shouldn't have" He said appreciatively. He really hadn't expected it. And then she held out a nice old leather book and he took it gently in his hands. "Wow." he said, looking over the book, inspecting it. He didn't have many books like this of his own, and it really was nice. He listened to her explain what type of book it was, while looking it over. "I do like to read. Especially mysteries." he said with a smile. When he heard her say stupid he shook his head. "Not stupid at all. I really appreciate it Amelia." he said giving her a really warm smile. Of course she was still wearing that necklace he knew Wood had given her, so he wasn't going to press his luck. It was just enough for him to be standing here, being able to look at her all dressed up, holding a gift that meant a lot to him. "I think I'll keep it." he said "Thanks Amelia."

He hadn't stopped. She felt like her body got heavier but she managed to keep up. That couldn't have been a good sign. He had to have heard her calling for him. Then again while he hadn't stopped he hadn't run away either and Lucas was a Quidditch player. If he wanted to he could have made a run for it so that had to be saying something. Right? "I was worried you were trying to lose me on purpose." She did her best to joke but it came out half heartedly mainly because she was so darned nervous that it might be the truth.

"Shut up." Amelia blushed when he complimented her appearance. She certainly didn't feel nice to look at but Lucas complimenting her almost made her believe that she could pass off as a woman. Even if just for a split second she could maybe be beautiful to someone even though she was a hideous looking ogre. "Yeah but, you see, I wanted to and so I did. You should know by now that you can't boss me around." She offered with a half grin still trying to approach things like they could still be friends. She was still trying to figure it all out. She had never experienced a kiss that had felt like the one they had just the previous night. But that couldn't be right. It had to be her mind playing tricks on her. No kiss with Oliver had ever felt like the singular kiss Lucas had given her. Or had she given it to him? How had the moment melded into one that would be so absolutely perfect if it wasn't for the fact that she had a boyfriend?

"I'm glad you like it." She admitted actually pretty relieved. At least she had managed to get the genre right a fact that surprised even herself. Still, despite the pleasantries there was still something hanging in the air between them. A weird sort of inescapable tension. It needed to  be acknowledged. "Hart, you must think I'm the worst witch alive for doing what I did." She sighed looking down at her flats defeated. Some would argue the Keeper didn't know what defeat was being such a seasoned athlete who strove to win in every match. She didn't know when to back down and would always fight to her last breath. This was somehow different though. She felt guilty and, in a way, she felt like she was, for the first time, losing. 

"I was just sad... and confused... and you were there... and being so nice... and opening up and I..." Made a mistake? But she didn't feel that way. She knew that she had done wrong but she certainly didn't regret it. "I'm sorry that I put you in that spot. It's not fair to you." She regretted the words as each one left her mouth. "We're ok, right?"

Now he was wondering why he hadn't stopped. But would that have appeared over eager? He didn't even know at this point. He wanted to keep her as a friend, since she was actually one of his closest friends, as sad as that was since it wasn't like the shared secrets or anything. But now he knew how it felt to kiss her, and it was so wonderful, but she was taken right? "I knew you'd catch up at some point" he said with a smile, but he was so conflicted inside.

"Why would I shut up when it's true?" It was a change of pace with her, but it was very nice. Sure he liked her just fine in her usual apparel, and in fact if he just had to see her on that it would be fine, but she did look quite beautiful in the dress as well. "I wasn't trying to boss you around. I gave up on that ages ago" he said trying to joke around with her. Try and be normal, even though it wasn't normal. Could they go back to being normal? He hoped so, but he was also leaving. How much time would they have to really have it go back to normal? He was planning on leaving as fast as he could, trying to get away for what he knew could be coming at home. Sure he legally could cast spells now, but his father had years of practice with spells, and he hadn't been fast enough yet to block the spells cast at him. He desperately wanted to avoid that.

"I definitely like it. Thanks again" he said with a smile. He really did enjoy reading and it was a very thoughtful gift. Years later it would still be on his book shelf, a little more well loved from being read a couple of times, but still in his possession. He listened to what she had said and how she looked down at her feet "Evans, it's not your fault. I shouldn't have done that. You're with Wood. I know better... ." He shouldn't have kissed her. But it just sort of happened. But he didn't want to be the guy who kissed people in relationships.

"It's okay, you don't have to explain it" he said. He didn't want to have to step back, but it wasn't for him to step in here. No matter how much he wanted more of the kiss. "No, it was me that put you in a bad spot. You are with someone. I shouldn't have done that." If she wasn't with someone it would be different. With how good that kiss had felt, he would try and see if there was anything there on more of a longer basis.but she wasn't. "I don't see why we wouldn't." But he didn't know. He hoped they would be.

He was apologizing but it wasn't his fault either! Damn him for being such a gentleman. It made these sort of instances harder. "Lucas, you're single. You can do whatever you want. You're not to blame. You don't even like Oliver." She encouraged with a sigh feeling frazzled by this whole mess. Why was she trying to reason and make him not feel at fault? Probably so she felt less guilty too because she had liked it. She could admit that to herself even if she couldn't say the words aloud.

"But I do." She corrected him, rather implored him. "I do because I did it and it's the wrong thing to do. I don't want you or anyone to think I'm like that. I'm not. It just... It happened.. I don't know why or how but..." I don't regret it. "Everything is just so weird and again I'm sorry for putting you in that spot." But not for doing it. Somethings were better kept in secret for both of their sake. "It was wrong of me to do and you don't have to be sorry for anything so stop saying it." Even in apology she couldn't help but boss the poor seventh year around a funny image since he beat her in both age and height.

He assured her that they would still be ok and friends she offered him a weak smile. "Good." And it was. She was relieved to hear it like a big weight had been lifted off of her. "I'll see you around then?" And she hoped that she would. Instinctively she closed the gap between them and went up on her toes to kiss his cheek. Once her lips touched the warm, rough flesh she froze. Her eyes widening. This was probably also a mistake. She had never done that before. Stepping back nervous eyes looked away and her head lowered. "Uh... Good luck?" With graduation or the rest of your life?

He didn't understand why she was apologizing or trying to just put the blame on herself. He was as much to fault, if not more than she was. He knew she was taken and he still kissed her. "I can't just go and kissing other guy's girls. I knew you weren't single and I still kissed you. It's probably even worse, given I don't like the guy. Therefore it's my fault." He hadn't wanted to put her in a spot like this, where now she could feel as though she did wrong by her boyfriend. He should have known better, even if it did 'just happen'. He shouldn't have let himself get into that situation.

"Evans, it happened. I don't think any differently of you for it. I shouldn't have let it get to that point...." She really wasn't at fault for it. He knew better. "I put you in that spot. You didn't. Okay?" It would be easier if she put the blame on him, especially as she was still clearly with Wood. He was leaving and he already didn't get along well with Wood. She could internally blame him and go about her relationship as if nothing happened right? If that's what she wanted. "It wasn't like I didn't participate Evans."

He didn't want to lose her as a friend. It was part of the reason he had panicked so much the night before over what would happen when they saw each other again. But how realistic was it that they'd even stay friends? He was leaving in a few days from the school and heading out into the world. Who knew when they'd be able to see each other again "Sounds like a plan." he said with a nod. Then she kissed him on the cheek and felt her freeze as she did. Then she backed away. It was shame there wasn't anything in the way and they had to feel this way. Like there was something wrong about doing things that felt good. "Uh... thanks. Good luck to you as well" He said looking at her.

He wondered when the next time he would see her would be. He figured he should be honest with her. He'd hate her to think he just left because of all of this. "Evans, I have to tell you." he said lifting his hand to scratch the back of his head like he was uncomfortable, "I got invited to try out for a team in Australia. Of course that doesn't mean anything, but I could be headed away from here for a while. But I'm sure we'll run into each other."

"Okay. Lets just both be wrong." She relented with a weak shrug. "But I'll be the more wrong one." The comment was added quickly with the tiniest of forced smirks. Some of this felt so helpless and she wasn't used to feeling that way. Unable to do anything and not brave like the Gryffindor she was. A kiss should not throw her for a loop and it certainly shouldn't make her a scared heap. But it did. Nothing made sense anymore ever since Lucas' lips had touched hers the previous evening. It had sucked the wind out of her more than any magic spell had ever done. But had it been the same for him or was he really just as suave and collected as he was currently letting on. My what money could buy you: Apparently good looks and a confidence.

Good luck to her? But she wasn't graduating. Good luck meant goodbye. She might not be as good at spells as everyone else at the school but she felt that she could read some subtext and this particular bit kicked her right in the gut. He didn't want to see her. He was wishing her well. Of course this made sense though. He was probably secretly appalled she had kissed him when she had a boyfriend like some tramp. Hating herself she decided, in a definite change of character, to accept her defeat and began to walk away only to be stopped by his announcement.

What? He was going to audition for a team? A Quidditch team? But that meant... "Oh. Wow." Wow indeed. "Congrats... That's..." Terrible. Complicated. Scary? "Great. You must be really excited." What else was there to say? "Yeah. I guess I'll see you around." And with that she turned to hurry away. She needed to join Wood's family at the graduation in the stands anyways.

<CLOSED>